Fight With Roommate Puts Friendship, Access to Netflix in Jeopardy

Sources confirm that longtime friends Max Jensen and Justin Tyler recently got into an argument that may end their friendship, as well as Jensen’s streaming access to thousands of hit movies and critically-acclaimed television shows.

Tensions have risen ever since last week when Tyler, who has access to Jensen’s Netflix account, allegedly got drunk and hit on Jensen’s girlfriend, stole half an ounce of marijuana from him, and rear-ended his car.

“After all the shit he pulled, I told Justin he might as well kiss his Netflix account goodbye. At this point, I really don’t feel he deserves to watch as many episodes of Breaking Bad and Futurama as he wants,” said Jensen.

“I guess I kinda messed up,” Tyler admitted. “A lot of things will change, like Max’s Netflix password and the fact that I don’t subscribe to cable right now. But most of all it’ll be hard to lose Max as a friend—he has a lot of great qualities, like instant streaming and a huge movie collection. I’ll really miss him.”

“The more I think about it, the more I realize what a dick Justin is,” said Jensen. “He makes fun of my gay brother pretty much every day, he owes me a ton of money, AND I suspect he’s responsible for the death of my fish. Maybe one day we’ll be able to slowly rebuild our friendship, but I’m not sure whether I’ll ever be able to trust him with my Netflix password again.”

At press time, sources confirmed that Jensen had a change of heart and forgave his friend. The two were last seen watching Trailer Park Boys in Tyler’s living room.

Originally published: September 2013

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