Area Manager Going With ‘Just Checking In’ As Subject Line Of Latest Email

Saying that the generic three-word phrase just made sense for what he was trying to get across, middle manager Jason Hoffman announced this past Monday his decision to once more go with ‘Just Checking In’ as the subject line of his latest email.

“Sometimes simpler is better,” said Hoffman, defending his use of the utterly meaningless phrase. “People got a lot on their plates, you know? The last thing they need is one of those subject lines that takes as long to read as their assigned readings.”

“Save the good stuff for the body – that’s what I say,” Hoffman continued. “Gives them a reason to open it, you know?”

Upon further questioning, Hoffman admitted that such brevity in personnel relations could be seen as “kind of abrupt,” or “at least vaguely passive-aggressive.”

“But they get it – I’m a busy guy,” Hoffman went on. “I have TPS reports to glance over and then give mediocre performance reviews with no justification, office meetings to hold where I consistently show up 15 minutes late, and I’m also trying to beat the rush so I can catch the Nuggets’ game on TNT.”

At press time, Hoffman had received an email titled ‘Quick note’ from his own superior, which caused him moderate distress until he worked up the courage to open it the next morning.

 

Originally published Dec 2013.

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