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Domino’s Pizza Unveils New Meat Lovers’ Salad

Citing consumer interest in healthier options at dinnertime,...

  • Sep 9, 2014

Gynecologist Diagnoses Area Man With Hypochondria

According to sources at the University of Michigan Health System’s...

  • Sep 9, 2014

Single Bout Of Physical Activity Sustains Area Man’s Self-Esteem For Months

PEAK OF SELF-WORTH—Although the act occurred over 2 months ago, a...

  • Sep 9, 2014

Michigan Daily Gets Final Say On Summer Blockbusters

HOLLYWOOD, MI—With the summer movie season over, Hollywood’s...

  • Sep 9, 2014

Sophomore’s Standards For Attraction Lowered For Only Male Professor

Noting his breadth of knowledge in the field and the fact that he is...

  • Sep 9, 2014

Campus Juniors Getting Head Start On This Semester’s Nervous Breakdown

With the fall semester still in its opening weeks, a number of...

  • Sep 9, 2014

‘Ice Piston Challenge’ Takes Turn For Worse At Hydrodynamics Lab

What began as one laboratory assistant’s quirky take on the recent...

  • Sep 9, 2014

Town Barely Survives Months-Long Onslaught Of Festivals

CONFETTI-STREWN WASTELAND – According to recent on-the-ground...

  • Sep 9, 2014

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