Cinema’s 12 Greatest Twist Endings

1. Darth Vader is Luke’s Father.

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2. Soylent Green is people.

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3. Rosebud is the sled.

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4. Evelyn’s sister is also her daughter.

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5. Kevin Spacey is Keyzer Söze.  Wait, what?

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6. Hold up.  Was that the ending of The Usual Suspects?

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7. Jesus Christ, Rob!  I still haven’t seen it!  I told you to run the movies by me before you publish the fucking twists!

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8. No, Rob, the movie is not still going to be fun!  Its fucking tagline is “Who is Keyser Söze?”  How am I supposed to enjoy the movie?  No!  No!  Stop fucking telling me to calm down!

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9. I might as well skip it now!  I’ll just watch something else.  Is Se7en any good?  I hear that it has a pretty good twist.

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10. What do you mean, “Kevin Spacey is great as the killer in that one, too?”  Are you fucking kidding me, Rob?!

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11. I can’t believe this.  I’m done.  I fucking give up.  Really smooth, Rob.  I hope you’re happy.

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12. Fuck it. They’re on Earth in Planet of the Apes.

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