There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but for many distraught widows of sailors who were lost on their voyages, that’s the last place they’d want to look to find a partner. That’s the reasoning behind LandLubbR, the exciting new dating app made just for these widows!
“In this day and age, standing out on your balcony overlooking the ocean and wistfully hoping, despite the ever-increasing doubt, that you might one day see your husband again just doesn’t cut it,” said creator and Senior Marketing Director Lacy Huang. “LandLubbR makes it quick, easy, and even fun to browse potential matches right here on dry land.”
“LandLubbR ensures that no matter who you might settle down with, there is zero risk of them being cast overboard during a storm, captured by ruthless buccaneers, or even,” she added with a chuckle, “devoured by a kraken.”
Huang was inspired to create LandLubbR after her own former fiancé was lost on an expedition to Antarctica (yikes!). “After I got the telegram saying Julian was lost and presumed dead, I was inconsolable,” she said. “I must’ve spent hours at a time standing on the edge of a cliff on the shore, contemplating taking my own life so I could join Julian in eternal happiness.”
“And to make matters worse, all of my friends started settling down and starting families. But there I was, cooped up in my house refusing to eat,” Huang explained. “I thought, hey, I’m still young, why should I have to be lonely just because my fiancé was swallowed up into the icy depths, never to be seen again? There are plenty of other women like me and we all deserve our shot at true love.”
Huang and her current boyfriend, an accountant with a professed fear of deep water, met on the beta version of LandLubbR. “Unlike Julian’s ship, we’ve been going steady for a while,” she said with a wink.
Surely this is good news for all the lovelorn widows out there who thought they’d be confined to crushing loneliness for the rest of their days! LandLubbR hits the app store next week.