Ross Sophomore Unsure When To Mention Banking Aspirations To Project Group

BBA sophomore and aspiring investment banker Evan Kozek reported a general feeling of anxiety upon meeting his new project group for the first time and not immediately knowing the optimal time to mention his career goals. Kozek, 19, said he typically prides himself on making sure coworkers know the sort of work in which he’d like to participate, but claimed that “he just couldn’t find the right lead-in” to “organically” let the members of Section 009 Group 5 in on his dreams.

“There was this one point where someone mentioned how bullshit that TO midterm was, so I nearly jumped in with a comment about the bull market shitting on conservative portfolios,” revealed Kozek. “But stocks were projected down today, so I didn’t want to seem like a tool.”

When reached for comment about his decision to share his aspirations with the group, Kozek said, “I think everyone appreciates knowing their colleagues’ endgames.” The sophomore also reported that he includes some reference to finance or private equity before the third meeting with any group.

“I know that if my professors are aware that I’ve got my eyes on Goldman, they’ll probably be more willing to help me succeed. Same thing with peers, classmates, and people who happen to be in adjacent bathroom stalls – it’s like, ‘Hey, I’m a big picture guy. I could probably do a great job leading.’”

Other members of the group admit Kozek seems preoccupied during meeting times. Said Ross sophomore and fellow group member Jenn Bailey, “Evan’s got this mysterious thing going on—almost like he’s always waiting for something. The other day I asked him if I could scan a page from his textbook and he asked me about my five-year plan.”

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