SAC Student Thinks Sitting Next to Girl During Screening Constitutes First Date

Fischer said he’s looking forward to the “sequel” of the date.

Screen Arts and Culture student Ian Fischer had his fingers crossed Wednesday evening in the hope that sitting next to “that cutie from lecture” during a screening of Battleship Potemkin in MLB Auditorium 2 constituted a date.

“It all started when she answered a question in lecture,” confessed Fischer. “I turned to hear an explanation of the symbolism of the butterflies in La lengua de las mariposas, but was left wanting an explanation for the butterflies in my stomach.”

“I’ve been out of the dating game for a while,” added Fischer. “So I wasn’t really sure how to pop the question. Then I thought, maybe I don’t have to.”

According to Fischer, the course’s weekly mandatory film screening during which he would be surrounded by all of his classmates, provided the perfect opportunity to “test the waters” with his potential girlfriend.

“It was pretty simple actually. I asked if anyone was sitting in the seat next to her, she stared at me, I sat down, and voilà! I thought to myself, ‘this will be such a quirky first date story,’” said Fischer.

As the massacre at the Odessa Steps unfolded on screen, Fischer reportedly pulled a bag of cold popcorn from his backpack and offered to share it with the “future mother of [my] children.”

“She was so focused on the movie, she didn’t even respond,” said Fischer. “Completely unaware of my existence—it was the cutest thing.”

“At the beginning of the second, act she ran to the bathroom, but when she came back she forgot where we were sitting,” added Fischer. “She must have been so confused, she ended up six rows in front of me. Luckily I was able to sneak down the aisle and fill her in on what she missed.”

As the credits rolled, Fischer waited in the lobby for his crush to collect her things. Fischer reportedly walked her home afterwards from a respectable distance of six feet while she listened to her iPod.

“Next week we’re watching Casablanca, so I’m bringing the mints if you know what I mean,” said Fischer.

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