Man In Military Uniform Intimidating The Shit Out Of Everyone At CVS

The CVS employees stood a little straighter as the soldier checked out so as not to disrespect the troops.
The CVS employees stood a little straighter as the soldier checked out so as not to disrespect the troops.

According to multiple eyewitness accounts, a man dressed in a full Army uniform entered CVS located on State Street early Thursday afternoon, as if his presence would not scare the shit out of everyone there.

Bystanders were distressed by the situation.

“Shit, I hate when this happens,” cashier Michael Wilkins reportedly murmured while wiping a bead of sweat from his brow. “Am I supposed to give him a discount or something? I hope he doesn’t buy anything.”

CVS employees said they were neither notified, nor prepared for a potentially armed member of the United States military to buy a Sierra Mist at 1:25 p.m. “I honestly feel guilty that I was so uncomfortable,” reported shopper Jasmine Bluth. “I have nothing against the brave troops that risk their lives for this country, but I was totally freaked out by his big, heavy boots clunking up and down aisle four.”

Store manager Geoff Hepner stated that he had not been in previous contact with the Pentagon, and did not anticipate “a deployment to the freezer aisle.” He was concerned for the shoppers if the pharmacy and convenience store, noting, “At least he didn’t have one of those helmets on. God, those things are terrifying.”

One customer gave her spot in line for the soldier, “I just couldn’t stand another minute, I wanted him out of there as soon as possible.”

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