CSG Candidates Promise To Use This Whole Thing For Law School Applications

Martin is excited to bridge the divide between himself and law school.
Martin is excited to bridge the divide between himself and law school.

Announcing their candidacy over social media over the past weeks, CSG executive candidates have promised that they will use their platforms to write extremely compelling law school applications.

Katie Martin, an LSA junior running for Vice President of the student body with the eMbrace party, noted that while she hopes to better campus, she also wants a kick-ass law school essay.

“CSG officers have the power to invoke incredible change on our diverse campus,” said Martin. “As well, the leadership role looks great for those top 10 essays questions.”

The position’s responsibilities include interfacing with university administrators, leading weekly assembly meetings, and reflecting on the whole shebang in 800- 1000 words when they eventually apply to law school. Although the potential for milking the experience extends into the candidates’ early twenties, the official appointments are only for one academic year.

“This campus is broken. Past administrations have made pledges to this student body without following through. If I’m given the honor to be president, I will use my time as fodder for a personal statement,” declared presidential candidate Jeremy Reid. His party’s platform includes ideas to increase diversity in classrooms, to create a mental health task force, and to be accepted into a top law school.

Central Student Government elections, which will be held in late March, allow the student body to appoint student leaders who will be shoeins for their law school of choice. The executive team of CSG is responsible for awarding grants, authoring resolutions, and planning out that cincher paragraph that shows both humility and good judgement.

“I’m here to work on behalf of those who have been silenced, with a firm determination to go to graduate school,” remarked yet another candidate and law school hopeful, Jenna Webb.

At press time, candidates were scheduled to debate the merits of Harvard Law in terms of getting a judicial clerkship after graduation.

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