University Waives Race And Ethnicity Requirement For Students With One Black Friend

The university is looking into offering a minor for people with multiple black friends.

Delineating an update to graduation requirements for all students in a recent campus wide email, the University of Michigan has announced that beginning next semester the race and ethnicity requirement would be waived for any and all students who report to have “up to and exceeding at least one friend of color.”

“This change is part of an initiative to combat racism on campus.” said LSA academic dean Martin Daniels in the email. “Since students with at least one black friend cannot be racist, they require no further education on issues regarding racial or ethnic intolerance and will be free to focus their studies elsewhere.”

The old version of the requirement necessitated all students to take a class centered around understanding differences in race and ethnicity different from predominating academic perspective of the white european male, which the administration now sees as “obsolete on a campus where so many of the students already have one black friend.”

“To continue to require students to take a 3 credit course broadening their understandings of marginalized identities in spite of their friendships with one or more student of color is antiquated.” said University of Michigan President Mark Schlissel in a recent interview.

“In some ways, it’s more racist to harp on racial injustices of the past than to move forward into equality with our one or more black friends.”

At press time, the university officials announced that the administration officially no longer saw color.

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