Despite meticulously analyzing the packaging and ingredient list on his 7/11-brand microwavable burrito, 32-year-old accountant Sam Krumholz reportedly has no idea if it will be any good.
“I’ve seen this go both ways,” reported Krumholz as he spoke to the media outside the convenience store. “This might hit the spot, or it could turn into an utter shit show. I guess we’ll find out soon.”
Despite willfully ringing up the purchase, 7/11 clerk Dan Simon wasn’t too optimistic in regards to the fate of the customer’s prospective meal.
“Yeah that sucker’s going to explode in 30 seconds,” Simon remarked as Kurholz left the store. “But hey, this man’s taking a chance, and I’d be a fool to get in his way.”
As Krumholz arrived at his apartment, he affirmed that the quality of the burrito remained ambiguous.
“I have no expectations,” he claimed as he finally got to his kitchen and began to fumble with the wrapping. “But I owe it to myself. I owe it to everyone. I have to see if this burrito is any good or not.”
At press time, it was revealed that the Mexican style wrap was “salty.”
