Disappointing. This Psych Major Can’t Even Read My Mind

What a waste of tuition dollars! Turns out this dullard psychology major doesn’t even know how to read minds!

This student has been studying the mind for six semesters, and while he can name piles of long-dead academics and identify the prefrontal cortex, he can’t so much guess what color you’re thinking of at any given moment.

If you can’t even do that much, you should just switch majors at this point. I bet this cretin couldn’t even predict what I’ll have for dinner, let alone my career path. The total ignoramus doesn’t even own a set tarot cards. ESP? More like ESPlease drop out. Bet this motherfucker can’t look in a crystal ball and tell me vague prophecies or generalized life advice either. Why do you even bother going to class? How much is he paying for this?

This dolt can name the effects of every mental health disorder and rattle off facts about the Stanford prison experiment but can’t speak to a single ghost? Pathetic.

What’s next? An aerospace major that can’t fly? A criminal justice major that hasn’t done a crime? An astronomy major that isn’t an alien? See how ridiculous that would be? This simpleton better step it up if they ever want a job.

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