Attendants of this year’s Great Lakes Medieval Faire have confirmed that the most historically authentic part of the event was the potent odor let off from the event stands, as well as from their occupants.
Sources report that, in addition to heavily researched exhibitions including realistic jousting matches and blacksmithing demonstrations, visitors were also treated to the sights and smells of barnyard animals and a time before indoor plumbing.
“I’ve been going to Renaissance faires since I was a little kid, so I’m a pretty harsh judge when it comes to authenticity. I can’t tell you how many times some phony vendor has tried to sell me a ‘vintage pewter mug’ that is clearly some tin-smelted garbage,” said Level 13 Paladin and local accountant Alec Williamson. “But, I have to say, I was really impressed by the lack of silly modern amenities like deodorant, hand soap, and methods of mechanical transportation that don’t shit right on the ground like these noble steeds”
While many have lauded the Great Lakes Medieval Faire for its dedication to showcasing the Middle Ages’ smells, both human and animal, this year’s celebrations also highlighted the “cacophony of musical melodies from a menagerie of hand-crafted instruments.”
“Yeah, I was walking around looking for the turkey leg stand, but I was eventually lured into a secluded forest grove by a clan of bagpipers and one page playing the lute,” said Jessica Flanders, salon receptionist and part-time pirate wench.
Professional historians and amateur roleplayers alike have collaborated to make this year’s Renaissance Faire the only reenactment in the area to “capture the essence of the era where lords were lords and m’ladies were m’ladies — the way it should be.”