Cedar Point Named Best Amusement Park In Sandusky, Ohio

The park also has the highest concentration of funnel cakes in all of Sandusky.
The park also has the highest concentration of funnel cakes in all of Sandusky.

For the third year in a row, Cedar Point has been voted the number one amusement park in all of Sandusky, Ohio.

“The voters have spoken,” said Samuel Jennings, a writer for the popular publication Amusement Today. “In another landslide win, Cedar Point has been named the best amusement park in a town consisting of almost 22 square miles.”

Although Cedar Point did not earn enough votes to be considered for Best Amusement Park in the United States, it easily won the competition for best amusement park in a town with little else but a diner, a few boats, and a lone Margaritaville.

“Cedar Point has 17 roller coasters, making it the best amusement park in a town whose next-best attraction is the Merry-Go-Round Museum,” said voter Adam Merlin.

A survey revealed that 90% of people who visited Cedar Point had the most fun they have ever had in Sandusky, Ohio. The majority of visitors also identified Cedar Point as the best Snoopy-themed park in all of Sandusky.

“I thought nothing could beat the Maritime Museum in Sandusky, but, oh boy, was I wrong,” said park visitor Timmy Bates. “Cedar Point might even be better than Sandusky’s mall, which has both a Cracker Barrel and a Texas Roadhouse.”

Although the park was voted number one in Sandusky theme parks, Cedar Point’s daily live-music concerts placed fifteenth in the Best Amusement Park Entertainment category.

A statistician from the American Coaster Enthusiasts has confirmed that Cedar Point’s Top Thrill Dragster is also the tallest roller coaster in all of Sandusky, Ohio.

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