Sources indicate that local school bus driver Barry Jondelson — currently running late to drop kids off at Marbrook Elementary School— is about to really start gunning it.
“Yeah, he’s definitely about to start going really fast in a second,” said third grader Marcy Hanson. “I think he just whispered something to himself about ‘showing ‘em who’s boss,’” Hanson observed. “We never really know exactly who he’s talking about, but usually when he says that we start going really fast,” she added.
“I like it when he goes fast,” said fifth grader Cole Matthew. “I hope we crash into something and it explodes. That would be so badass,” Matthew continued.
“Yeah, I’m definitely about to whip this bad little bitch because that’s the only way to get these tykes to school on time, and I won’t be letting them down, not today,” Jondelson stated. “When I take this sucker out on the expressway strip I max out at like 90 to 95, 100 God-willing. Yeah, I’m good — but I do it for the love of the game.”
Sources report that Jondelson began working for Washtenaw Area Schools in the 2019-20 school year, following dismissal from his previous delivery job after landing his Domino’s Pizza Car into a peat bog.
“The road was slippery,” Jondelson reported.
At press time, Jondelson was seen putting the pedal to the metal, whispering that it was “go time, baby.”