This week, multiple students in a History 321 lecture reported their suspicions that classmate Marissa Getter’s mid-class alarm was a reminder to take her birth control pill.
Sources indicate that Marissa Getter is an LSA sophomore and, according to some, “a major class disruptor.”
“Marissa’s alarm went off and at first I was like, ‘Oh, that’s weird, she must have forgotten to turn it off this morning,’ but then I realized it’s gone off during every lecture this semester. There’s no reason she’d have an alarm set for 3:30 pm unless it was for her birth control,” concluded junior Haley Pond.
History 321 professor Dr. Terrence reportedly did not notice the marimba music coming from Getter’s cell phone and continued discussing the diverse medical practices of Ancient Rome and Greece.
“Yeah, I heard that girl’s alarm,” said LSA junior Jake Stanton. “If it’s for her birth control, that’s pretty annoying. She knew she’d be in a quiet lecture hall, so why would she set it for right now?”
Sources confirmed that Getter was seen scrambling to turn off her phone and discreetly taking a sip of water after placing a white, powdery tablet in her mouth.