Friends of 32-year-old Dana Baruski have recently claimed that she has “more of a carpet moth energy” despite her having a large butterfly tattoo on her shoulder.
“Dana’s not unsuccessful, but she’s not the best person,” said Anne Moritz of the Cutco sales rep and hobby photographer. “I’d say she’s still in the chrysalis phase. Actually, wait, no. She’s still in her caterpillar phase. Actually, no. Larvae phase. Also, she’d be a carpet moth.”
Reports confirm that Baruski sought out a monarch butterfly tattoo “to symbolize [her] coming into [her] own, and embracing gratitude in her life.” In the last few years, however, acquaintances argued that Baruski is more “like a household pest” in terms of sensibilities.
“Dana has rental properties that she never takes care of, she resells secondhand clothes from the thrift store on Depop for ten times the price, and she unironically calls her 55-year-old fiancé ‘bae’,” said Riley Staffen. “If she’s a flying insect, she’s going to be the type that pursues moisture and eats fabric.”
At press time, Baruski was seen getting a tattoo of a lotus flower to symbolize her spiritual rebirth, despite giving off “cactus vibes” as a person.