During last Friday’s lunch recess period at Werriworth Elementary in New Brunswick, New Jersey, first-year quarterback Carsten Bruno-Ruby reportedly created a wide-receiver route made-up entirely of zig-zags.
Before sketching out a “shit-load of zig-zags” on his hand, Bruno-Ruby was overheard detailing the route in his team’s huddle on the lower playground. “Ok, Y-stick diagonal drag, pump fake to Garrett, dragon blade spring-load to Chaz. Break on 3. 3,2,1…break!”
As the ball was hiked, spectators reported seeing nine-year-old wide-out Chaz Renowsky just running diagonally left for a foot, then right, then left again, before eventually going back to the right just to see Bruno-Ruby escaping the pocket and running the ball into the end-zone himself.
“I was wide open,” said Renowsky, in a post-game interview. “But at the end of the day, it’s a team sport, and we’re really happy to get the win and be in a good spot heading into playoffs.” According to Bruno-Ruby, first-string quarterback and commissioner of the lunch recess football group, “Next week Conner wants to play.”
According to the weather report and Werriworth Elementary’s academic schedule, next week’s matchup will be contingent on if the Scholastic Book Fair runs longer than expected or not.
At press time, Renowsky was seen being admitted to the ER, presenting vertigo-like symptoms.