Washtenaw Hermit Crab Gets Up And Leaves

Witnesses have confirmed that the enormous hermit crab residing peacefully at the corner of Washtenaw and Hill has finally up and left. “I was on my way to Luther House when I felt the ground start to tremble beneath my feet,” said sophomore...

Cute Couple Gets Matching Bronchitis

Reports indicate that notoriously adorable couple Jerry Gilmore and Sarah Willis share everything with each other, including their recently diagnosed bronchitis.  After spending a romantic weekend in Chicago together, they came home with...