Following the Michigan basketball team’s heartbreaking 49-51 loss to UCLA Tuesday evening, U-M students are realizing that they are actually the fools this April first. After an exciting month following the team’s progression to the Elite Eight,...

The University’s second and final wellness break scheduled for Tuesday, March 23 has students already making plans for how to spend a whole 24 hours with no additional work. LSA sophomore Matt Theilen explained that he’s using the wellness break...

Third year political science major Harry Pollack was left in despair Monday night when he realized, while peer reviewing a classmate’s essay, that the writing was substantially better than his own paper. “Shit, this paper is so much better...

LSA junior Max Adelson recently speculated whether the loud screams penetrating his bedroom walls could be his roommate playing video games or engaging in sexual intercourse. “I’ve been trying to sleep for 45minutes,” said Adelson, burying his...

Several eye-witnesses reported that LSA sophomore Cassius Banks was once again overthinking his Venmo caption for a $10 payment to a friend. The payment, which was to go towards their Uber Eats order of a Bacon Club Chalupa Combo at Taco Bell,...

In a move that shocked all those close to her, SMTD sophomore Julia Harmon, who is known for her singing, recently announced that she is also a songwriter. “People definitely didn’t see it coming,” claimed Harmon. “Everyone who knows me was...