The Good News farm in Homer, Michigan has enjoyed a recent bump in egg sales thanks to Barry, an unbaptized chicken capable of laying deviled eggs. While the Amish farmers routinely baptise newborn chicks hatched on the farm, Father Jebidiah, the...

Never a show to shy away from tackling tough subjects, acclaimed childrens’ television program Sesame Street has announced plans to introduce a new character to help young viewers understand the contentious subculture of humans dressed up as...

As Thanksgiving approaches, Americans across the nation are reportedly finding themselves in a bind to come up with even a single thing for which they are grateful. “Oh man, I should’ve started thinking about this earlier,” said area man...

For the third year in a row, Cedar Point has been voted the number one amusement park in all of Sandusky, Ohio. “The voters have spoken,” said Samuel Jennings, a writer for the popular publication Amusement Today. “In another landslide win,...

After a particularly steamy shower last Thursday, sources have confirmed that Max Reno’s cold, wet shower curtain clung to his bare ass. The derrière disaster occurred at approximately 7:14 am, as Reno got into the shower to rinse off before...

Sources at the Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History confirmed last Friday that tour guide Marcus Wagner was just a little too excited about the taxidermy exhibit. Wagner reportedly began the public tour in the dinosaur room before...

Hungry Electrical Engineering senior Nathan Feldstein walked into the Subway off South University Avenue, where he was met with an array of unlabeled meats and cheeses. Nervous, Feldstein approached the counter, where a smiling Subway employee...