In response to an unprecedented number of wildfires in 2020 that have scorched land throughout the United States, GOP lawmakers have proposed a bill that would order the removal of all flammable objects from the nation’s forests. While experts...

Local realtors Angela Jackson and Dave Hardy have reportedly completed their renovation of a downtown sex dungeon into a cozy one bedroom apartment. The pair began refurnishing the sex lair after purchasing the lower-level of an abandoned building...

The Elf on the Shelf belonging to the local Lawson family has reportedly given an underwhelming performance this year, with the family reporting “he just doesn’t seem to be that into it this time.” The novelty doll, known for its tendency to...

According to a recent report, prospector Yukon Cornelius has been forced to quarantine after being unable to taste silver and gold. Cornelius is a world-renowned prospector known for his work at the NorthPole. His innate ability to taste silver and...

According to a new report by the Associated Press last Monday, there is a 100% chance that a 90% effective vaccine will be released exclusively to the top 10% of the world’s population, divided accordingly by the GDP of the world’s countries. AP...

In what is being called the “biggest scandal of the year,” local woman Caroline Marlen was “disgusted, and appalled” to discover that her father, a man she’d previously considered to be “all about our family, and totally devoted to...

Moments after finishing his morning shower, area man Alex Durmott, 35, clumsily stepped on his bathroom scale, hurting himself badly. Durmott, a self-proclaimed “klutz,” is no stranger to a stubbed-toe or the occasional twisted ankle. This...