Big Shot Waiter Not Writing Down Order

Witnesses have reported that hot shot Buffalo Wild Wings Waiter James Richards took an entire party’s order last night without using a pen and pad to record even a single order. “At first I thought he was just not gonna write down the drinks,”...

Apple Unveils New iPhone XXL For Big And Tall Men

According to reports, Apple engineers have recently developed and released a new “heinously large” phone made specifically for “strong, sturdy, and stocky guys.” The company has stated that the larger, more durable design allows its “big...

Female CEO Apparently Empowering

After a speech delivered by IngenSys CEO Alice Walters at Rackham Auditorium last Friday, it was reported that a number of attendees had interpreted Walters’ remarks as “empowering.” Walters, known for her ruthless business savvy and disregard...

Dog Loves His New Food, Reports Mom

After the Miller family switched its dog’s food from Pedigree to Iams, area mom Sally Miller announced over the phone last week that he “absolutely loves it.” Lucky, the golden retriever who has eaten the same dry food for almost ten years...