Desperately hoping that at least one of his friends would realize he was serious, area man Jeff Somers was reportedly struggling to gauge whether others had understood that he wasn’t actually joking when suggesting they all go out to Applebee’s....

Beating out stiff nationwide competition, Glen Murphy from Phoenix, Arizona was named the 2018 April Fool early Saturday morning. Murphy, who works as an analyst at Weinberg Marketing Solutions in downtown Phoenix, has been a complete buffoon all...

After adopting the popular game as a relaxing distraction from the chaos of everyday life, it is being widely reported that area man Malcolm Bowers fucking sucks at solitaire. Bowers, looking for structure after being dumped by his girlfriend of two...

Sources recently reported that area woman Renee O’Connell is “totally open” to any constructive criticism on the rough draft of her senior thesis granted she’d be allowed to cry about it later that day. O’Connell told reporters that while...

After a grueling, three hour day of learning colors and the alphabet at Appletree Daycare, local toddler Hazel Canterbury was devastated to come home and learn that there is no such thing as the letter “elemeno.” “I’m out there sitting...

Multiple sources have confirmed complete and utter confusion in regards to the continued service of ‘Pete’s Records’ to its local Ann Arbor community. ‘Pete’s Records’ has enjoyed a long and illustrious history of selling records,...

A spokesperson for the Trump Administration released a statement on Tuesday saying that Mr. Peanut, the mascot of the brand Planters Peanuts, will be appointed as Secretary of Agriculture. “We believe that Mr. Peanut’s extensive agricultural...