Despite owning a four-year-old pug, the product of centuries of selective breeding and human manipulation, 60-year-old John Dennison has been clear that he feels morally opposed to gay marriage on the grounds that it is “just plain unnatural.”...

With the wealth gap becoming wider than ever over recent years, the nation’s dwindling middle class has reportedly been reduced to just Jeremy Smith of Allen Park, Michigan. After surveying the entire country, Jeremy was found to be the only...

As the rest of Delta flight 1427 prepared for takeoff by eagerly tuning in to the flight attendant’s demonstration on the aircraft’s safety procedures, area passenger Hugh Daniels made the conscious decision to continue playing solitaire on his...

Even thousands of years after the fact, angels from all over heaven are still reporting feelings of betrayal after God, the Almighty Lord of Hosts, promoted his son Jesus Christ to savior of mankind. “I mean, come on,” said Uriel, the angel...

In a recent press release, which offered little for the practical reasons that accompany the change, the nation’s white people have detailed plans to spell Caitlyn entirely differently. “Caitlyn has a long and storied history, with plenty of...

Citing the woman’s untimely aplomb in the face of chaos last Tuesday, passengers on United Airlines flight 4481 to Denver were reportedly unnerved by their flight attendant handing out snacks during turbulence as if the plane were not about to...