Aquarium Opens Plastic Exhibit

In wake of the ever-increasing amount of plastic in Earth’s oceans, the Mariner’s Aquarium in South Beach, Miami has unveiled its new plastic exhibit. The exhibit boasts hundreds of different types of plastic, ranging from microplastics to...

Hedonist On Search For Passion Passion

Stating that his normal passions alone were no longer sufficient, local hedonist Jimmy Santiago has reportedly vowed to devote more time to finding his passion passion. “Sure, being a hedonist is great, but everything has its downsides,”...

Lion Weighing Pros And Cons Of Eating His Stepsons

Last Sunday, as he crouched over their father’s carcass, a Kenyan lion contemplated whether or not it would be worth it to eat his two stepsons. The lion had just recently mauled his stepsons’ father, thus stepping into the role of the deceased....