So, I just found out that the Every Three Weekly is supposed to be a satire newspaper. I don’t know what to say. I’ve been writing for this paper since my freshman year, yet I was never informed about this? When I read my first issue of the...
The time I spent on this paper was the best of my life. Same thing with you, Dana, but all good things must come to an end. I thank you for your support, and all you’ve taught me. Again, this goes for you and the staff, Dana. Just know that I love...
Sara Lebow graduated peacefully in her sleep surrounded by E3W staff. She will be remembered for being the second hottest member of the paper and for getting offended by her own front page headlines literally every time. Sara is survived by her two...
The E3W has several worthy enemies: the Ross School of Business, Elon Musk, and “Instagram Poet” Rupi Kaur included. Despite the success of her first collection, Milk and Honey, I believe her odds of usurping me in a one-on-one cage match are...
As my time as a University of Michigan student comes to a close, I feel nostalgic yet excited for what the future holds: me developing an impossibly idealized view of my college years. I know I’ll look back fondly on late nights at Pizza House...
I swear to god if Joseph Clemente stays on this paper it’s fine. But you’ll lose me. You can keep his consistent humor and his adorable haircut, but I’m not staying around to see how it ends. Oh? What’s that? Him?!
90% of the issues we print go to waste. I used to deliver these puppies, and can tell you almost no one reads a physical copy anymore unless it is shoved in their face on the Diag. Print media is dead; most of our readership is online now anyways....