The Blue Devil’s blood will be drunk by the winning team’s point guard. Marking the commencement of this year’s NCAA Basketball Tournament, NCAA officials performed the ceremonial sacrifice on Tuesday, murdering a Duke Blue Devil under the...

Marking the commencement of this year’s NCAA Basketball Tournament, NCAA officials performed the ceremonial sacrifice on Tuesday, murdering a Duke Blue Devil under the light of the full moon.

Area man and local Xerox sales clerk John Chason furiously accosted the referee of his ten-year-old son’s recreational soccer game over the weekend. Chason reportedly blamed the referee for missing a clear penalty in the 2nd quarter, and for his...

Dixon reflects on his football career while waiting for his nurse to return and feed him dinner. Citing increased penalties, TV timeouts, and a general feeling of the game’s decreasing physicality, retired NFL lineman and recipient of years of...

Scherping’s t-shirt and “trick knee” are reportedly all he has left of his playing days. Forty-two-year-old tax accountant David Scherping was seen exercising at his local gym last Thursday in a t-shirt bearing the logo of his former high...