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Roommate Leaving Dirty Dish In Sink Annoyed With Sink Full Of Dirty Dishes

Area sophomore Richard Daniels recently announced that he was “a...

  • Apr 7, 2017

Tallest Second Grader Solemnly Takes Place At Front Of Line

Demonstrating his respect for the position as he made his way to the...

  • Apr 7, 2017

Senior Waiting Until Graduation Day To Decline All Venmo Requests

“For a while I was just waiting for my paycheck to post, but then...

  • Apr 7, 2017

Harbaugh Demands Traditional ‘Go Blue’ Banner Be Replaced With 20-Foot Brick Wall

In an effort to “boost morale” and “punish the body to reward...

  • Sep 10, 2016

University Lauds Self For Number Of Useless Campus Resources

A new campus resource proudly displays its profound lack of...

  • Sep 9, 2016

Board Of Regents Sick Of Schlissel Blowing Up Their GroupMe

Schlissel has been known to like his own posts in the GroupMe. On...

  • Sep 9, 2016

Area Man Frantically Searching For Hawaiian Shirt To Cultivate Laid-Back Vibe At Party

Sullivan (pictured) anxiously searching for the perfect relaxed darty...

  • Sep 9, 2016

Addition Of ‘lol’ Successfully Masks Bitchy Tone Of Text Message

Long’s texting strategy reportedly “saved her...

  • Sep 9, 2016

Report: Housemate Not Not Trying To Fuck Hot Neighbors

Said Haldeman,“I wouldn’t not smash some poon if one walked...

  • Sep 9, 2016

Area Man Pretends To Wash Hands After He Pees

In the midst of a study break during a long night at the UGLi, LSA...

  • Feb 19, 2016

Study: Guys Who Let Girls Keep Coat in Their Rooms at Parties 100% More Likely to Have a Girl’s Coat in Their Room

The University of Michigan Institute for Social Research published a...

  • Feb 19, 2016

Modern-Day Übermensch Achieves Sophomore Standing One Semester Early

Casting aside the shackles of earthly limits, LSA freshman Eric...

  • Feb 19, 2016
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