‘Ice Piston Challenge’ Takes Turn For Worse At Hydrodynamics Lab

What began as one laboratory assistant’s quirky take on the recent viral activism phenomenon ended in tragedy this Tuesday when Jonathan Walker, ’17, was blasted by the facility’s supercooled fluid cannons at an instantaneous pressure over 80 PSI. Te stunt, which was intended to raise awareness for the neurodegenerative disease ALS, resulted in Walker’s immediate death.

“Jon always wanted to take things to the next level,” said roommate Margo Swanson, ’16. “I guess standing half-naked in front of sixteen battleship-grade hydraulic cylinders was taking things a bit too far.”

Walker agreed to film himself being walloped by the equivalent of 300 power-washers after being ‘nominated’ to perform the Ice Bucket Challenge by his fraternity brothers.

“It’s terrible,” remarked Darius Richards, ’17. “If we’d have known that Jon was going to put himself in a position where 90% of his internal organs would rupture catastrophically on first impact––then, shit, we’d have told him to think twice.”

“Or,” Richards continued, “To just cough up the 100 bucks.” A funeral service is scheduled for friends and family of Walker later in the week. Sources close to the family confirmed that it will, in all likelihood, be a closed-casket event.

Originally Published September, 2014

 

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