Area Mom Giving Dad Divorce Eyes From Across Table Again

Citing her cold, penetrating stare and distant, joyless demeanor, neighborhood sources confirmed Tuesday that area mother Julia Fearon, 45, once again spent the better part of a family dinner treating her husband to the obvious look of contempt known colloquially as ‘divorce eyes.’

“It’s a hard look to miss,” said Tommy Fearon, age 10. “Whenever Mom gets in the mood to pack up and end it with Dad for good, it’s written all over her face for the whole house to see.”

Reportedly, Mrs. Fearon has made a habit of using such non-verbal cues to communicate her desire to dissolve their loveless, ill-fated marriage.

“For a while, she wouldn’t even give Dad the time of day,” said daughter Emily Fearon, citing Mrs. Fearon’s refusal to say even a passing word to her husband on her way out the door. “Now, she just peers up at him from behind her wine glass and gives him these eyes that say: ‘Martin Fearon, you repugnant piece of shit: When I come up with the cash to hire an attorney, you better lawyer the fuck up, because I’m taking the Saab, the furniture and the good china,’” she explained.

“Gets him every time,” Fearon’s daughter added, recalling Mr. Fearon’s tendency to glance up at his wife just long enough to flash her an acrimonious smile and thank her for dinner, whereupon he gets up to scrape his smoked salmon filet into the trash, drop his dirty dishes in the sink and curtly excuse himself.

When reached for comment, Mrs. Fearon contested her family’s characterization of her expression. “No, no, it’s fine, really,” the mother of two said.

“It’s just been a long day,” she added, beaming at the thought of the alimony payments she’d soon be collecting.

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