Study: Education Major Now More Marketable Than Ever, Dad

Citing lower unemployment rates and increased pay, several studies have indicated that the education field has expanded in the past few years, making teaching now more profitable than ever—OK Dad?

Finance expert Charles Eckert—who, listen to this Dad, graduated cum laude from USC so he probably knows what he’s talking about—said he attributes the widening of the field to increased government focus on education as a means of empowering children of lower classes. Eckert said that these changes should manifest themselves in an increase of available jobs in education of around five percent over the next five years.

So, for once, Dad, maybe you can get off my freaking back.

“The American government wants to give its children the tools to be empowered and chose what they want to do with their own lives,” Eckert said. “This means a lower student to teacher ratio and more spending on education, which in turn is widening the field for college graduates.”

Empowering our children to choose their own paths. What an interesting concept! Apparently one that’s familiar to Shawna Michaels, college sophomore majoring in education. According to Michaels, her parents always supported her dream of being an English teacher. I guess they thought it was better to encourage her than to constantly compare her to her stupid cousin Marcus, who isn’t even a real doctor! Michaels said she is extremely happy about the news, and maybe you could at least try to be happy for me, too.

“I’ve always wanted to become a teacher, but I’ve been a little hesitant because of the financial strains,” said Michaels. “At least now I’m more hopeful there will be a job waiting for me after graduation. A lot of my friends in other majors can’t say that.” Huh dad, I guess majoring in education isn’t “a complete waste” or “a job for people who aren’t smart enough for real estate” after all.

According to Eckert, this should be hopeful news for college students around the nation pursuing education, so maybe for once in my life you could just be supportive, OK dad?

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