Less Popular Roommate Wondering What ‘We’re’ Doing Tonight

In a typical act of social ineptitude, LSA freshman and less popular roommate Carl Hunter perceived friend and roommate Jamie Preston what “we’re up to tonight.”

Hunter, described by peers as “unique,” “kind of a downer,” and “always around somehow,” rarely presents plans of his own creation and prefers to “play it by ear,” he said.

“I try to keep an open schedule and just be up for anything that comes my way, ya know?” said Hunter, once again finding himself without Friday night plans. “I just kinda see what people are up to and go from there.”

Hunter’s roommate Preston reportedly did have plans, but was reluctant to bring the “social hindrance of a human being,” along with him. Nevertheless, he said, Hunter is likely to tag along.

“He always ends up coming along,” said Preston of Hunter. “No matter how many hints I drop that I don’t want him to come along, he still seems completely oblivious.”

Preston has taken his roommate to multiple social outings—from movies to frat parties—none of which Hunter was actually invited to.

“Last weekend was amazing!” said Hunter, referring to the night when he tagged along with several hallmates to a frat party. “The whole squad hit the town and just straight killed it, man. All of the guys were there, and my man Jamie was getting it on with some chick! It was just a real wild time dude.”

“That’s what makes me great; I just do what feels comfortable, ya feel me?” the mild nuisance continued. “I always just kinda go with the flow of things, people can really dig a chill guy like that.”

At press time the “ever-present” roommate was accompanying Preston to a house party where he proceeded to play with the dog all night.

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