NBC to Debut Much-Anticipated Talent Show ‘America’s Got Judges’

Citing the concept’s exceptional performance in nationwide focus groups, NBC announced Tuesday that their newest talent show, “America’s Got Judges”––in which contestants will be judged on their ability to judge by a panel of judges––is scheduled for a much-anticipated primetime debut this fall.

“Judging has always been in America’s DNA. Whether it’s quietly sizing up commuters on the bus, noisily shaming a mom at the supermarket, or crushing a person’s dreams of stardom on national TV–– we all appreciate the art of having and sharing strong opinions,” said NBC spokesperson Chris Westwood in a statement earlier this week. Westwood went on to explain that being excessively critical of others was a “national pastime” that NBC sought to honor with its new reality show.

“Who hasn’t sat down to watch ‘The Voice’ and thought to themselves, ‘I could totally tear this guy to shreds way more abusively than Adam Levine?’ We’re just giving Americans an opportunity to prove their ability to be compulsively judgmental on the national stage,” continued Westwood.

Contestants will be assigned to a team that will constitute his or her panel. Each team of judges will be asked to critique a multitude of acts, from aspiring young singers to performing ferrets. Though negative criticism will reportedly factor in as a key aspect of each contestant’s judgmental repertoire, the ability to balance heartless criticism with occasional bouts of self-indulgent praise will also be under the microscope of the starstudded lead judging panel, which is rumored to include such greats as David Hasselhoff and Simon Cowell, with potential guest appearances by several of the nation’s mother-in-laws.

At press time, several “America’s Got Judges” hopefuls were seen preparing for the show’s late April auditions by publishing thinkpieces criticizing the entire premise of the show.

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