Woman Pretends To Remember Details Of Friend’s Emotional Strife

LSA junior Andrea Kaener met for dinner with longtime friend Emma Pellen last Tuesday, an evening that Kaener referred to as “an exercise in complete bullshitting.”

Kaener, who has known Pellen since the two were in high school, explained that she had forgotten exactly why Pellen’s was having a hard time, but was able to “fake [her] way through most of the conversation.”

“I thought we were just meeting for dinner,” Kaener said. “But as soon as I asked how she was, she just said, ‘oh, you know’ and teared up. That’s when I knew I was in trouble.”

“I’m sure she’s told me all this before,” Kaener explained, “but I’ve been busy, you know, and it’s hard to keep up on whether my friends are going through breakups or worried about finding jobs. All I really needed to do was nod my head and give her a hug and she had no idea.”

By the midpoint of the meal, Kaener was able to confirm that Pellen was facing an issue with her mother. “It’s good I figured that out,” Kaener explained, “because at first I thought her boyfriend was cheating on her and I just kept calling him a bastard.”

“What’s important is that I was there for her,” Kaener continued. “I mean, Emma and I have been through everything together. What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t hold her hand through whatever the hell is happening to her now?”

Kaener reported receiving a text from Pellen after dinner requesting another “girls’ night sometime soon,” but forgot to respond.

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