Man Ruins Anniversary Present With Personal Touch

In what sources described as an otherwise perfect anniversary present, Ph.D student Chris Spilka ruined the “beautiful” bracelet he bought for his girlfriend of three years by adding his own personal touches.

The Harry Winston 14kt gold chain was reportedly in impeccable condition, and “fit seamlessly with girlfriend Jenna Doran’s personal style” until Spilka “obliterated” it with gaudy charms commemorating different aspects of Doran’s personality and of their relationship.

“I put a pizza slice on it because we met while working at Pizza House,” Spilka said of the incoherent wrist piece made up of multicolor embellishments he had custom ordered for Doran. “I knew Jenna likes elephants so I had to put one of those on there, too.”

Also included on the bracelet were gemstones for each of their birth months, the first initials of each of the pair’s names, and a blue and gold block “M” plated with imitation Swarovski crystals.

Sources close to the couple confirmed that, while the gift was thoughtful, it was virtually unwearable as it could not be conceivably paired with any outfit Doran owned.

“The bracelet was such a nice sentiment,” said Doran’s friend, Emma Wiler. “It’s nice that Chris is so supportive of Jenna’s time in med school—I just think the gold syringe was a little much.”

At press time, Doran had placed the bracelet in the back of her closet along with the scrapbook Spilka made her for Valentine’s Day.

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