Sources close to seventh-grader Alexis Hayworth, who just switched schools and is struggling to make friends, say she just needs to be herself. It was further suggested that, in addition to staying true to who she is, Hayworth should consider talking less about horses.
“Back home in Montana, I rode Butterscotch, this really beautiful Palomino at my barn,” said Hayworth. “A group of girls at my school rode with me, and we used to hang out all the time. I guess here in Chicago they don’t really do that as much.”
Hayworth’s mother said she believes that her daughter is perfect just the way she is, but that it might help to “cut it out with all that pony stuff for a while.”
“I mean, horses were cool when we were, like, five,” said classmate Keely Williams. “But we’re practically teenagers now, and this isn’t an episode of ‘The Saddle Club.’ I don’t want to see your Clydesdale figurine.”
Williams added that the girls in Hayworth’s class were becoming increasingly irritated by Hayworth’s ‘My Little Pony’ themed school supplies and her insistence on the merits of Mane-N-Tail shampoo.
“It’s definitely an adjustment period,” said Hayworth’s mother. “But I know Alexis will get through it. Everyone has trouble making friends when they’re the new kid. I know she’ll find a great group of girls as long as she keeps being open and friendly, and stops showing off her equestrian team ribbons.”