Man Buying Toilet Paper Clearly Needs It Right Now

Pinching his cheeks and hopping from side to side, shoppers at the local Walgreens confirmed that area man Anthony Margolis clearly needed the toilet paper he was purchasing immediately.

“This guy rushed in and walked straight to the back where the toilet paper is,” Walgreens cashier Ally Rechkemmer told reporters of the man who desperately needed the hygiene product he was aiming to purchase. “He was all the way back in the front of the store and in line before I even noticed.”

Sources behind Margolis in line confirmed that he charged towards the cashier as soon she was available and before the previous customer had gathered their belongings.

“I don’t need a bag,” Margolis reportedly said to the cashier while wiggling uncomfortably as he slid his credit card into the chip reader. Margoles’ fidgeting reportedly intensified after the chip reader did not initially respond to the card’s insertion, and the Walgreens employee told him, “Oh, it wasn’t ready for ya.”

“Thank you,” added Margolis, after the transaction was completed.

At press time, Margolis was exiting the store too quickly for the automatic doors to let him through.

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