Racially Tense Nation Relieved By Start Of Another Season Of Watching Young Black Men Fight Over Ball

Providing a cathartic break from another year of heightened racial tensions in America, sports fans everywhere were delighted by the start of another season of watching young African American men fight over a ball in towns all across the country.

After what has proved a tumultuous year for race relations in the country, with numerous white nationalist and KKK groups sparking violence and outrage, a morally strained public were relieved by the beginning another year of watching some of the finest young black athletes put their bodies on the line for a chance at stardom and the entertainment of the viewing populace.

The start of the fall season, which has long marked the start of America’s premiere sporting event, was a welcome sight for fans all across the country who have felt the strain of a divided country. One fan, Mark Traum, remarked that kickoff would be a welcome sight. “I feel like all you’re ever seeing on TV these days is alt-right this, Trump that,” stated Traum, a white man who’s admitted previously that he is largely unaffected by the current political unrest. He later added, “It’s just good to get back to football finally.”

Numerous fans in cities and on college campuses, which have observed widespread incidents of police brutality and racial violence in recent months, flocked to stadiums to watch mostly black youth sacrifice their long-term health for a shot at stardom.   

The National Football League also expressed excitement and optimism about the start of the football season. Joe Landau, a PR representative for the NFL stated, “the NFL is obviously very troubled by all that is going on in this country, and we are firm believers in equality,” stated Landau, citing the healing power of a sport that has historically exploited young black athletes for profit for the better part of a century. “We really believe that communal experiences like this one can do wonders in bringing the people together.”

Though football, a sport practiced widely only in America, has been cited by some to be a reflection of America’s bloody ethos and the militarization of our youth. Fans like Traum expressed excitement about the entertainment it brings him. “Man, there’s just something about all those big guys out there fighting tooth and nail, cracking skulls and knocking each other around, that just lets you know this country is going to be alright.”

At press time, a divided nation was looking forward to cheering only for their team.

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