Benson, seen here doing alright after the mean biff.
According to recent reports, local sophomore, Chase Benson, was seen eating it as he nonchalantly rolled over an unseen crack in the sidewalk between classes.
Immediately after his fall, Benson was reported to have shown no distinguishable change in emotion, moving on with a reasonable amount of aplomb.
“You know, if you were just kind of out of it and going about your business, you might not even have noticed,” said sophomore James Miller. “I had to sort of gauge the reactions of people around me to make sure that his fall was an actual thing that had just happened, and not simply an image I had conjured in my mind.”
Adds junior Cara Wallace, “It kind of makes you wonder what’s going through that greasy head of his. I mean, is it a certain degree of self-confidence that allows you to carry on as if nothing of substance occurred? Is it a void of all feeling brought on by desensitization from previous public screw ups? It really gets your gears turning.”
Benson – a notably adequate skateboarder who simply uses the board to get from place to place around campus – was always a prime candidate for such a blunder, but the abrupt change in control did surprise many in the immediate line of view.
“Look, Chase is no Tony Hawk, or Ryan Sheckler, or even Shepard Fairley, so you wouldn’t expect to see catch himself from an imminent fall or roll out with some brand of experience,” states onlooker Tom Paulsen. “It’s not as if he crushed it in any one way or another, but you can tell he’s been putting in the hours.”
When reached for comment, Benson paid no mind to the questions being asked, casually rolling on with his Skull Candy headphones left in.
