Controversy ensued across the University of Michigan Campus as History Professor Jim Erickson denied one of his students a letter of recommendation to fuck his mother.
“I am very sorry to inform you that I cannot grant you my recommendation,” wrote Erickson in a recent email that has since gone viral. “My department has pledged an academic boycott against screwing my immediate family members, and this boycott includes writing letters of recommendation for students hoping to do so.”
The professor’s statement has ignited severe backlash, and many university students and professors alike did not hold back while addressing the conflict.
“He shouldn’t have a job at this school,” said Maria Samuels, one of Erikson’s students. “It’s a shame, too, because I really enjoyed his class. As I’m only a Freshman, I don’t even know if I’m ever even going to want to fuck his mom, but it’s wrong and unfair for him to deny other students the opportunity.”
Despite this uproar, Erickson has remained firm in his position, showing no sign of wavering any time soon.
“As a teacher, I assume the responsibility of encouraging and empowering students to pursue any educational endeavor that they so choose,” said Erickson in a televised Interview last Saturday. “However, I cannot turn my back to the policies of my department. In an ideal world, I would recommend and advise every single one of my students to run train on the woman who raised me. But, because doing so would put my career in Jeopardy, until I hear otherwise, students must pursue my mother on their own merit.”
Protesting Michigan undergraduates have since organized a growing fund so students in this predicament can have access to fuckable moms in all corners of the globe.
