Report: English Teacher Divorced Now

'Just like Frost’s two roads diverged in a yellow wood, my wife’s loyalty has diverged from this marriage,' said Powell.

Following reports from multiple sources, it has been confirmed that high school English teacher Drew Powell is now divorced.

Students visiting Scotch Hills Community High School over Thanksgiving break have discovered that Mr. Powell’s wife left him for a biology teacher at a nearby private school.

“It is what it is,” said Mr. Powell. “I just keep going back to what we talked about after reading Gatsby second quarter —sometimes things just aren’t meant to be, but we must beat on, boats against the current, borne ceaselessly into the past.”

Though Powell found the separation to be “unexpected,” some at Scotch Hills were unsurprised.

“Powell’s wife left him?” said former student Shane Marks. “Now that I think about it, that actually makes a lot of sense.”

“Of course, I thought that we would last forever,” Powell said, “but, as the great Robert Frost so artfully asserted, nothing gold can stay.”

“As the Bard once said, life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more,” said Powell. “It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”

Students have reported that Powell recently assigned students to write a 12-page essay about loss.

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