Dam Builders Announce New Streaming Service

three beavers sitting on a couch watching television
The creators are reportedly optimistic that their service will “flood the market.”

Reports confirmed that dam builders around the nation have announced a new streaming service that will be going live next month.

“Amid the new climate crisis, we’d like to give water users around the country a chance to try out our flood-prevention programs and irrigation subscriptions,” stated Dan Irving, a key construction worker in the new project.

According to reports, Irving’s partner Pam Wells seemed very determined that this new service would not only skyrocket profits for the dam builders, but also help deter potential subscribers from their competitors, the beavers.

“You don’t have to leave it to beaver,”Wells assured, “With our multi-tier subscription options, users will be able to have a damn good time, optimizing their dam experience. We offer the ‘Standard Dam’ for our poorer cities, the ‘Premium Dam’ for our middle-class cities, and of course, the ‘God Dam’ for our rich cities.”

At press time, Irving and Wells were both seen streaming a new video of various creeks and other waterways for the service’s social media accounts.

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