Area babysitter Marcus Fitzgerald was shocked late Monday evening when the trio of toddlers stacked up in a trench coat that he was babysitting revealed themselves to be a regular-sized adult man.
Sources say the man had managed to deceive his babysitter for several hours, before his coatstrap got caught on a doorknob, ruining the illusion.
“I’d thought it was strange that they were so capable,” saidFitzgerald. “They would walk around the house and go to the bathroom, and they even bent over at one point to pick something up. I was surprised when I looked at where I thought the second toddler’s head would be, and it was just some dude’s belly button.”
When asked about his motivation, tot impersonator Jackson Temple, 61, noted that “toddlers are always stacking up inside a trench coat, going around, and freeloading off of services meant for adults. Last month, I lost a job interview to a pair of nasty four year-olds with a business degree. So I guess you could say I just wanted to give them a taste of their own medicine.”
At press time, Temple was seen soliciting three free ice creams from a reluctant Baskin Robbins employee.
