Area Woman Unwilling To Throw Away 5 Year-Old Urban Decay Palette

Eyeshadow palette with nudes, browns, and blacks with brush
Fare is reportedly clinging to the last crumbs of her favorite shade, “Smog.”

According to recent reports, local resident Ingrid Fare is completely unwilling to throw away her five- year-old Urban Decay eyeshadow palette.

“I bought this palette at full price after a night of binge drinking,” noted Fare in a statement. “I’m wearing this fucker to my funeral.”

According to witnesses, the palette is covered in layers of old eyeshadow, foundation, eyelash glue, and also contains multiple empty pans.

It has been reported that friends of Fare’s have tried encouraging her to throw out the palette.

“I’ve begged her to give that ratty ass thing back to God,” noted Fare’s friend, Paula Stein. “It just feels like she’s abusing the poor thing.”

“I’ve lost count of the amount of times that thing has given her pinkeye,” claimed another friend, Octavia Lee. “At this point, it’s just self-harm, if I’m being honest.”

Fare has allegedly stated that makeup expiration dates are “a suggestion”. In response to those who are concerned about her getting skin cancer, she reportedly said, “At least a bitch got her money’s worth.”

At press time, Fare was seen applying her 6 year-old Tarte Shape-tape concealer.

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