This Is Just Like Lady Bird

A young woman smiling.

Wow, this is just like Lady Bird! I’m having sex with a skinny white man who doesn’t really care if I live or die! This is seriously my Lady Bird moment.

Before this, he was talking my ear off about how the War in Afghanistan wasn’t real and paper bills are just a social construct, but coins are real. That’s literally so hot. He’s so deep. Just like Timothee Chalamet in that movie. Oh my God, that means I’m Lady Bird from that movie. That’s so cool.

You know, when I think about it, my relationship with my mom is just like that movie, too. There’s love there, but it’s… complicated? Wait, why am I thinking about this right now. That’s so weird of me. I’m literally hooking up with a guy that I told my friends looks like Timothee if, like, I squinted a little bit.

He’s even making me get on top and do all the work. This is literally cinematic. I should dye my hair pink.

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