Paranoid Much? Painting That Was Definitely There Before Continues To Hang Inconspicuously and Unremarkably On Wall

Uh, hello? Are you done staring yet? You’re saying that painting on the wall is alive? You mean, the painting which you have no reason to question whatsoever is continuing to hang on the wall, where and how it always has? 

I think you’re seeing things. That painting is totally normal in every way. Its placement on the wall is in no way noteworthy, nor does it induce you to question it or think twice. If you were a good, normal person, the painting would never cause you to double back, ever.

Look I don’t know why it’s the only painting in your house, or how you found yourself with such an unusually banal piece of furnishing, or why it doesn’t appear in the background of that photo of you and Sarah—but you have no reason to question it. Why would you do that? It’s such a safe, regular painting …

The painting certainly doesn’t seem to follow you as you walk by. How could it? Paintings don’t have eyes, silly. And that piercing, evil sound in your ears when you look at it … how could a painting cause that? It’s all in your head, you goofball. Such a simple, benign, innocuous, untroublesome, perfectly unobtrusive painting would never, could never do anything magical. You’re probably just tired. You should lie down …

And anyway, that painting has been there forever. I’m pretty sure we both have vague memories of seeing it every day.

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