Local man Bill Ward is reportedly unsure why everyone is saying “don’t say gay, Bill.”
Ward was reportedly confused after hearing seeing “DON’T SAY GAY BILL” in the news. “I mean, I really…don’t?” said Ward. “It doesn’t usually come up in conversation. Did I do something wrong?”
Human Rights Campaign Vice President Amy Braun was asked for comment on Ward’s situation. “I’m not really sure what the question was, but we are actively working against this discriminatory legislation,” said Braun. “We are fighting for everyone’s right to say ‘gay,’ including Bill.”
Witnesses reported that Ward was wondering if he had made a faux pas. “Should I be using a different term?” asked Ward. “Is ‘gay’ offensive now? I didn’t mean to offend anyone.”
“This bill isn’t taking away anyone’s freedom of speech,” said Florida Republican Mike Hirthe. “This guy Bill just needs to know that we don’t want that kind of content in our schools. But of course, everyone is still free to use gay as an insult.”
“It’s all ‘this Bill is so important,’ or ‘this Bill is going to protect our children,’” said Ward. “That’s a lot of responsibility to put on one guy.”
In response to New Jersey’s “Blaze It” Bill legalizing recreational marijuana, Ward said he was happy to comply.