Witnesses report that an unknown man walking down State St. having a “full-blown conversation with himself” was actually “making some good points.”
The man, aged approximately forty, was seen pacing up and down the street as passersby made way for him, allegedly listening to his “very insightful discussion about our responsibilities to one another and how we deserve to be treated.”
“They can’t treat me like this. Lord knows, I’m not perfect, but through all of the mistakes I’ve made, I’ve always tried my best, and that’s all I can do,” said the man, waiting to cross the street, gesturing around vaguely.
“Yeah, I heard him say ‘everyone deserves love, no matter where it comes from,’ while he was just dropping pebbles and picking them back up, and that inspired me to ask out my crush. We’re getting dinner tomorrow,” reported Clayton Shellenbarger, who crossed paths with the man near Walgreens.
Other witnesses reported seeing him continuing to “forgive himself for his shortcomings and love himself for his flaws,” as a small crowd followed him, some reportedly weeping.
Sources confirm that the individual in question has been booked on Dr. Phil.
