Reports are coming in that Sarah Oliver, who took Orgo II last semester, is acting like she has centuries’ worth of wisdom over her friends currently in the class. “Oh, the exams? Don’t even get me started on those,” Oliver reportedly...

In the second-to-last class meeting of AMCULT 300, Professor Martin Gravel made sure to remind his students that their final paper, which he had not mentioned since January, was to be turned in the next day. According to Gravel’s syllabus, the...

Eyewitnesses reported seeing U-M swimmer Jason Marshall “absolutely whipping his moped like some kind of action star” on South University Avenue late Tuesday evening. Marshall’s quick and narrow turn into a back alley, according to one...

This past Tuesday, junior Sophie Mills was reportedly “feeling pretty badass” until her stomach started to hurt a little. “I had just aced my final, and I was planning to go to the gym later,” said Mills. “I even sat down to get a head...

Reports confirm that LSA freshman Caleb Baker recently became curious as to whether the additional $100 included in his meal plan were technically Dining Dollars or Blue Bucks. “I’m not sure what type of currency I’m actually spending,” said...

In preparation for the May 1st commencement ceremony, for which graduating students are encouraged to be present at a class-wide watch party in the Big House, U of M officials have drafted a statement in which they will hold attendees responsible...