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Two North end magnets inexplicably close to each other

Area Kid Beats Science, Touches Together Positive Ends Of Two Magnets

Eyewitness reports have recently confirmed that area fourth-grader...

  • Apr 3, 2021
A young man on a church pew with a sour look on his face

Area Man Insists All Encompassing Love For God Completely Platonic

Reports confirm that despite area man Tyler Lucero’s previous...

  • Apr 3, 2021
A woman uses a wireless controller to play a boxing game on a Nintendo Wii

Report: Mom Wants To Give Video Game A Spin

Witnesses confirm that Laura Jenkins, mother of 16-year-old Tommy...

  • Apr 3, 2021
A group of young kids on a stage wearing ridiculous costumes

Report: Kids In Talent Show Actually Think They’re Good

The audience of a local elementary school talent show were reportedly...

  • Apr 3, 2021
Scientist holding petri dish with sticker

Scholar Finds Pink “Notorious RBG” Stickers Responsible For 74% Increase In Human Rights

  • Apr 3, 2021
Bored man and woman lounging on couch

Girlfriend’s Brother’s Disney+ Account OnlyThing Holding Relationship Together

The romantic relationship between LSA junior Inez Welsh and SMTD...

  • Apr 3, 2021
Phone opened to ResponsiBlue app reading, "Why have you ordered so much feta bread in the last ten days?"

ResponsiBLUE To Start Asking Condescending Questions About All Past Mistakes

University officials have confirmed that the ResponsiBLUE app will...

  • Apr 3, 2021
Zombie in business casual clothing holding brain

Zombie At Networking Event Picks Keynote Speaker’s Brain

At a major campus networking event last week, zombie Katherine Waters...

  • Apr 3, 2021
Phone screen showing GroupMe app

GroupMe Conversation Screeches To Halt As Matt “Likes” A Message

A conversation in a campus student org GroupMe ended suddenly as club...

  • Apr 3, 2021
Man using ladel to pour jungle juice into cup

Jungle Juice Renamed Big Alcohol Pipeline

After learning of the horrors of deforestation currently occurring in...

  • Apr 3, 2021
Elderly man jogging

Report: Old Man In Arb Walking Fast

Sources have confirmed that an elderly man was spotted walking in...

  • Apr 3, 2021
Frustrated woman

Analysis Of Bad Dream Scarier Than Actual Bad Dream

Recent reports have confirmed that an interpretation of area woman...

  • Apr 3, 2021

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