Area Man Unaware Favorite Restaurant Just A Front

Following another evening of takeout from Papi’s Pizzeria, sources confirm that it became increasingly clear area man Barney Watt did not have the slightest clue his favorite restaurant was just the front used by the largest organized crime ring...

No Way In Hell Area Man About To Clap Along

Following an impromptu call for audience participation at a cover band concert for a local charity, area man Ray Donaldson told reporters Friday that there was “no way in hell” he was about to start clapping along. “Oh no,” said Donaldson as...