Local residents have become increasingly concerned for the mental well-being of the owner of the 1990 Hyundai Accent with stuffed animals lining the rear dash. Many residents have become convinced that this person, who must have spent upwards of...

Local man Eric Adams was shocked to discover last Friday that he was still a raging misogynist, despite his recent application of a thick, black nail polish. “Maybe I just need to add a few more layers?” wondered Adams out-loud as he unscrewed a...

Sources are confirming that area woman Rachel Becker has acquired a Lunette brand menstrual cup. In the three hours since she returned from Target with her new purchase, Becker has reportedly been listing the benefits of the blood bowl to anyone who...

Area man Stephen Bradley quickly lost hope that area woman Amanda Portman would ever reciprocate interest last week after viewing her live Instagram story that began two hours after Bowman sent an unanswered text. Bradley reportedly sent Portman a...

Sources at the Hot Yoga Studio of Pasadena, California are reporting that lone male participant Karl Prescott is most definitely cheating on his wife. According to onlookers of the 60-minute session, the 42-year-old was surrounded exclusively by...

Following a groundbreaking study, the nation’s literary theorists have reached the unanimous conclusion that everybody has just been pretending to enjoy the works of William Shakespeare for the past 400 years. “Our findings are irrefutable,”...